San Francisco Hugs a Possum

CHATTANOOGA, Tenn.—Just when those New Zealand possum jackets started to take off, San Francisco had to go and ban fur.

Actually, they didn’t ban all fur. Sheep and lamb are okay, because who cares about animals so docile they’re used as symbols of Christ? Sheep and lambs deserve to die because they’re so damn easy to kill. Unlike the wily raccoon, the swift fox, the slick otter, the independent coyote, and the rascally short-tailed weasel.

Free at last! Free at last! Thank God almighty the Siberian sable is free at last!

Of course, no sooner had the Board of Supervisors voted to liberate all the minks, beavers, otters, seals, and chinchillas of the world than yet another group of insane public scolds expressed outrage that the ban is directed solely at female consumers. These people obviously never saw Rudolph Valentino’s closet, much less the wardrobe of Ron O’Neal, better known as Super Fly. Somebody tell every rap mogul that the next time you wanna cue the Curtis Mayfield entrance music in San Francisco, you need to post two goons at the door so the Frisco cops don’t denude your floor-length mink trench or your fox bomber jacket.…

Read more at Joe Bob’s America on Taki’s Mag
(The opinions in this article are the opinions of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of Southern Nation News or SN.O.)

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