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(Babylon Bee) WASHINGTON, D.C.—According to inside sources, the Capitol Gift Shop has been inundated with tourists looking for Jan 6 hearing souvenirs leading one irritated employee to tack up a large sign at the entrance to the store reading “NO WE DO NOT SELL BUFFALO HAT SOUVENIRS”.
Margaret Carrington, descendant of a long line of distinguished Capitol Gift Shop attendants, spoke to reporters on the scene. “Yesterday 567 people requested the darn thing. Everyone from little two-year-old boys to elderly women has been asking where we keep the buffalo hats,” she said as a tear slid down her cheek. “We Americans love our history of revolution, and the Union and Confederate uniforms are big sellers here, but when we put in the order for an Official Commemorative Jan 6 Insurrection Buffalo Hat, Nancy Pelosi denied it just like she denied the request for additional protection of the Capitol for that day.”…Read the rest at the Babylon Bee
May 26 (UPI) — A South Carolina couple’s dog was officially dubbed the oldest in the world at the age of 22 years and 59 days old.
Pebbles, a toy fox terrier belonging to Taylors residents Bobby and Julie Gregory, was named the oldest dog living by Guinness World Records after her age was verified as 22 years and 59 days…
Man arrested after Johnny Cash water tower springs inappropriate leak
A water tower mural of Johnny Cash in his hometown of Kingsland, Arkansas, started urinating on those below after being shot by a vandal
(Classic Rock) A man has been arrested in Johnny Cash’s hometown of Kingsland, Arkansas, after shooting a hole in a water tower adorned by a mural of the country music legend, making it appear as if Cash was urinating on those below.
Local news channel Fox 16 reports that a sharpshooter took aim at Cash’s crotch, causing damage to the tower and a leak that was losing the town 30,000 gallons of water per day.
Kingsland mayor Luke Neal reports that repair work has started, with the tower drained and local supplies switching to well water. Neil has warned local residents that their water may be discoloured while the repair – estimated to cost $5000 – is being completed…. Read the rest at Classic Rock
(Supposed to be humor, but surprisingly accurate. – CPW)(Babylon Bee) As everyone knows, the only possible way to help the underprivileged is to give money to the government and let them do it for you. But have you ever wondered how bureaucrats help your hard-earned dollars make it all the way to the people who need it most?
Let The Babylon Bee break down the whole process for you… Read the rest at the Babylon Bee